When money is tight, everything becomes a potential stressor that may trigger relapse. Economic downturns make the recovering addict’s personal situation worse in that there is less perceived help available – either financial, job-related, skills training, and continuing counseling or support.
Foreclosures, bankruptcy, maxed-out credit cards, depleted checking and savings accounts, unpaid bills and past-due notices, collection demands, lawsuits, fines, legal fees and so on can mount up to the point where the individual in recovery sees no way out. Why not resort to the bottle or downing pills or injecting, inhaling, gambling, etc. as a means to cope with the economic calamity? While that’s certainly one way to look at it – escape – as always, the escape is only temporary. The economic problems of the recovering addict, mirroring the downturn in the economy, will still be there. They may even become worse. Thus, the escape is not only a delay tactic of facing the inevitable – it is also worthless as a solution. It simply doesn’t work.
You can’t ignore the economic downturn or your own personal financial situation. So, how can you deal with a worsening economic situation without resorting to relapse?
• First, don’t allow things to pile up or get to the point where you feel you don’t have any hope of coming out from under. Seek the help of a financial advisor – perhaps one of the resources available to you in your 12-step group or a program you can be referred to in the community.
• Work with your creditors to arrange a graduated payment plan, reduced payments, loan modification program, or the like. Creditors want their money, but some money negotiated in advance is better than no money at all. Generally speaking, they will be willing to work with you to create a repayment plan or schedule. You need to at least give this option a try. It will go a long way toward helping reduce the economic stressor that could otherwise do you in.
• Recognize that the economy goes through regular upturns and downturns. The cyclical nature of the economy is such that one usually follows the other. While this may not be comforting when you’re drowning in debt, it at least lets you acknowledge that you will probably be able to overcome your financial and economic difficulties at some point in the future.
• Take a tip from financial planners and organize, pare, and prioritize. Sort bills according to due dates, amount due, and prioritize according to most important. These include your mortgage or monthly rent, car and insurance payments, utilities, food, and recurring medical expenses. Eliminate all but essential expenses – at least until you’re back on solid financial ground. When you get back to work, set up an automatic deduction for the high-priority obligations (mortgage payment, car payment, etc.) from your checking account. This will ensure that there are no late payments and you won’t be tempted to spend the money instead of taking care of those bills. Just be sure that you deduct that amount from your check register so that you don’t overdraw your account – and incur overdraft fees.
Loss of a Loved One
Your biggest support will come from your loved ones – your spouse or partner, your immediate family. When you lose a loved one, however, your entire world is thrown into turmoil. You are at great jeopardy of relapse, as the loss of a loved one is one of life’s traumatic stressors that do the most damage. This is true of nearly every human being, but even more so in the case of those in recovery whose emotional state and ability to overcome cravings and urges is so fragile.
Where you once had the constant presence, love, encouragement and support of your loved one is now a gaping hole. You feel the pain as if it were a physical wound. Nothing cuts the pain – except going back to your addictive ways. This is a common trap that recovering addicts often fall into. They feel that there is no way out except to go back to a coping mechanism they’re familiar with – their addiction.
How do you survive the loss of a loved one without having it trigger relapse? This is a tough situation. There’s no getting around that fact. Platitudes about time healing all wounds will bounce right off you – as they do to most persons in the first stages of bereavement. People utter those words because they don’t know what else to say, and it is also true that time will help ease the pain. But, right now, that probably won’t do you any good.
What you can do to keep yourself on the straight and narrow road to recovery is to surround yourself with others who understand your situation, your addiction, the tremendous desire to escape your pain by succumbing to your addiction. Step up your participation in 12-step meetings. Go every day or several times a day if that will help. Ask for a referral to a grief counselor or participate in online grief counseling meetings, blogs or chat rooms. Ask your doctor for assistance in finding some help for you to cope with your grief.
Other tips to help you in your time of bereavement include:
• Spend time with friends. – Don’t sit at home alone and allow yourself to wallow in self-pity or remorse.
• Stay active. – Get involved in physical activity, exercise, sports, recreational activity, intellectual pursuits, going out to entertainment venues.
• Find solace in spiritual comfort. – Whatever your religious background or spiritual inclination, many persons in recovery find comfort in seeking the assistance of a higher power to help them weather this very emotionally-draining time. Prayer may work for you, or meditation, or going to church or contemplating the power of the universe. Listening to motivational and inspirational tapes may be helpful, or reading books on overcoming grief, especially those that are available through addiction recovery websites.
• Take it one day at a time. – This often-repeated mantra really does work. You can’t expect that you’ll have all the answers for all the days ahead, but you can do everything you can to engage in positive behaviors today. Be sure that you take care of yourself, including eating properly, getting enough sleep, and tending to your physical and emotional needs. Cut yourself some slack as well. You don’t have to be perfect, and there’s no timetable that you need to adhere to in terms of when you’ll start to heal from the loss of your loved one.
Source: Drug Addiction Treatment
